*Excerpt from the international bestseller You Were Not Born To Suffer, by Blake D. Bauer
Every day we’re faced with choices in our lives, both big and small, that shape our future and our health, our happiness, and our relationships. To really enjoy life and feel good about ourselves, it’s key that we get good at making decisions that are true to who we are, why we’re here, and how we truly feel. One way to do this is to see every choice as a turning point on our journey to a joyful and real life. At every crossroad, there’s always one way that doesn’t feel right and another that feels good or just necessary.
It’s not always easy to tell which way to go. Sometimes, both choices seem okay, and we’re not sure which one is truly best for us. In times like these, it’s best to wait and not rush a decision until we’re really sure about what we want deep down. It seems simple, but actually, many of us find it hard to know and do what’s best. This is because our minds are really good at trying to keep our hearts safe from hurt. We end up feeling torn, as if our heart and head are telling us to go in different directions, but they’re both just trying to bring us back to what’s true for us, right here and now.
A lot of us have become so disconnected from what we feel inside that we end up stuck in our heads, going around in circles thinking about what to do. Fear and doubt often hold us back from acting on our gut instincts. But this confusion is just a sign pointing us back to what we’re feeling at the moment, so we can deal with the feelings that keep our heart and mind from working together. It’s also important to know that we won’t see the way forward until we’ve learned what we’re supposed to from our current situation. We often stay in a bad place until we learn to really value ourselves and only choose to be in situations and relationships that make us feel good and free.
From my own experience, the right choice becomes clear when we’re truly ready to move forward, not just trying to escape a tough spot. After we’ve felt all the emotions and learned what we need to from what’s happening now, the best path will start to look bright with good feelings and thoughts that we can’t ignore, showing us the next adventure life has for us. When the right time comes, we can make our move based on what’s real, instead of just reacting out of fear or pretending things are okay when they’re not.
While we wait for our path to become clear, the best thing to do is small, positive things that make us happy and feel alive. Going for walks, writing, reading, having a bath, making a warm drink, working out, listening to music, painting, or hanging out with real friends—by doing things that make us feel good in the moment, we can enjoy our lives more right now. At the same time, we’ll start to see more clearly where and with whom we don’t feel good, or where we’re not treating ourselves with enough respect.
What activities, small or large, make you feel good, alive, and well?
What activities make you feel happy or bring out joy inside of you?
Which people or environments do you feel great around, simply because you can be yourself, or explore yourself, or do what feels true and healthy for you?
By identifying your answers to these questions and by focusing on these activities and relationships as much as possible each day, you will begin to increase the amount of time you feel good, alive and well overall. With consistency, this process will bring significant clarity to decisions, goals, plans and interactions with others, because the more you focus your energy on simply feeling good, the more you will naturally feel and know which choices are most aligned with who you really are, why you’re really here, and the quality of life you’d like to create.
Because the purpose of human life is to enjoy it fully, while learning what it means to love unconditionally, filling our days with the small things that make us feel great is vital to creating a fulfilling life. The small daily choices that build our energy, mood and health, as opposed to those that drain our energy or bring us down, are what provide us with the fuel we need to make our larger visions, goals and desires our lived reality. Without focusing on the small things that make us feel good daily, we cannot access the energy we need to move forward and create a life that supports our happiness and life purpose. Regardless of how attractive a certain lifestyle, career, relationship or dream-reality is, we will never create it without acting in ways that make us feel better and better each day. For this reason, every single moment offers a junction on our path to enjoying life daily. YES-WORTHY opportunities always present themselves to us, especially when we’re focused on what makes us feel well. If we can learn to act when it feels good, but wait to act when it does not, even when we feel insecure, anxious or scared, our heart will always guide us towards the lasting love, joy and peace we’re seeking.
Join Blake for one of his upcoming retreats at Drala Mountain!
About the Author: Blake D. Bauer
Blake D. Bauer is the author of the international bestselling book You Were Not Born To Suffer. He has helped thousands of people around the world who could not find lasting solutions from conventional medicine, psychiatry, or religion. Blake has an extensive background in psychology, alternative medicine, nutrition, traditional healing, mindfulness meditation, and qi gong. Based on both his personal experience overcoming deep suffering, addiction, and adversity, as well as his professional work with over 100,000 people worldwide, his teachings integrate what he’s found to be the most effective approaches to optimal mental, emotional and physical health.