Floral Notes and Bardo: How?


Floral Notes and Bardo: The Creative Chronicles of a Shambhala Mountain Resident
 is a regular feature on the SMC blog in which a member of our staff/community shares his experience of living as part of Shambhala Mountain Center.

How?

IMG_1219

Writing in the office now, after asking permission from my fellows to turn off the flickering overhead fluorescent lights.  Now, going to put on headphones to at least discourage folks from interrupting me.  If the people on the other side of the room begin talking loudly, or at all, I’ll turn on the brown noise.

Ideally, I’d write at home.

Activating brown noise now.

Oh, rhythm of computerized brown noise.  Soothing, on some level.  To the extent that it drowns out the chatter in English language that attacks me.  On another level, it sucks.

Anyway… Ideally I’d write at home, but I’m finding it difficult to do it all — morning offerings, cleaning body, tea, journaling, pillow time with Heather, full practice session, dharma study, breakfast — and also make it down to work at a decent hour.  Coming in at 10:30 already feels quite luxurious.  Adding the half hour, or even 15 minutes of writing… how?

How?

Man… I don’t want to cut any of it out.  It’s all important.  I want to work less hours in the office and still be paid the same.

On my way into the office today, a friend, a guy who arrived recently, who is younger — asked if I could meet with him some time — a student-teacher meditation/dharma meeting.  Of course I have to accommodate that.  And, I also have to wash dishes for an hour and a half this week, like every week.  And, what else?

Same old story — life is full.  So full.

Meanwhile trying to really turn myself towards poetics, approaching Naropa grad program — beginning in just a little over a year.

I guess writing in this office isn’t so bad.  But, it’s not ideal.  No, no, no.  I want to do my art in my own space, just after practicing.

Cursing to myself beneath my breath these days.  Embarrassing.  Lousy states of mind.

How though?  How to arrange life so that it’s not too much, and so that I’m doing the things I feel inspired to do?

I really just feel inspired to live a good life.  How?

Shambhala Mountain Center: is providing an intense training ground.  An opportunity for me to dig into this a bit.  To experiment.  To learn a bit about: how.

— July 20, 2015

~~~

PortraitTravis Newbill is a writer, musician, and aspirant on the path of meditation.  He currently resides at Shambhala Mountain Center, where he serves in the roles of Marketing Associate and Shambhala Guide — a preliminary teaching position.  Follow Travis on twitter: @travisnewbill

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.